Healthy Halloween

Can there be such a possibility?

After Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and Mondays, Halloween is yet another excuse to forgive excessive chocolate consumption. Instead of happy Halloween, maybe we should wish everyone a healthy Halloween?

I start to think about this today as I struggle to button up jeans that fit perfectly fine a week ago. How did this happen? Why does it take me 4 weeks to drop 3lbs but 5 days to gain back 6!

Its Halloween time and since before thanksgiving, there has been advertising for chocolate and candies everywhere and at greatly discounted prices. All my favourite chocolates for under $10? A box double the size for only $2 more? And they all come in cute ‘looks low fat to me’ sizes. Who can resist?

Needing to escape temptation, I travel to a friend’s house and notice several large boxes of recently purchased Halloween candy (dammit!). My friend goes on about how there used to be another box but it mysteriously vanished. At least I think that’s what she said. My mouth was already full of Oh’ Henry bars, while my arm was digging back in and seeking out the elusive bags of Reeses Pieces. We sit together munching away and try to figure out where the missing candy could have gone (Raccoons? Wayward children? Vagabonds?). No solution in sight, we crack open a second box and ponder some more. We think ourselves to be pretty bright, but unfortunately, it seems this will forever remain a mystery.

Even in the relative safety of the work office I’m not immune to sudden chocolate attacks. Staying late one evening, I’m privy to staff members placing handfuls of chocolates and treats on coworkers’ desks. They were only handing it out to one department (not mine) but after several minutes of begging them, they forced me to have a handful myself. Forced!
Munching on a Kit Kat followed by a Twix and finishing off with a coffee crisp (all minis, so low fat, right?), I ponder how anyone can have a healthy Halloween.

As I contemplate this, a dark angel saddles up beside me and, after I tell them to, they offer me one of the remaining homemade Halloween cupcakes on their tray (Halloween in the sense that they were made during the Halloween season). Devouring this iced beauty, I loosen my belt by one notch and wonder if I left these jeans in the dryer too long because they’re feeling a little snug.

Finally, Friday arrives and I vow to never have candy again. Before I make this vow official though (there was no clergy involved, after all), a co-worker shakes a big tub of Halloween candies at the group. Like an adorably cute puppy, I scamper over and dig in.

Snacking on starburst candies and mini Mr. Bigs (oxy moron?) I try to remember the last time I had seen the inside of a gym. It was only that morning and I distinctly remember being offered dark chocolate squares when I got off the treadmill….dammit!

Chocolates and candies inhaled, I once again reach out and look to above to make my ‘no more candy’ vow when I’m quickly interrupted (divine intervention?). This time the temptation is a box overstuffed with pre-packaged chocolates….and its one box per person.

Milky ways, snickers, butterfingers, 3 musketeers and Baby Ruths are the wares this gypsy is selling and I take her for all she has.

I remove the belt from my pants completely as it’s now cutting off circulation to my legs.

Healthy Halloween???

There’s no such thing.

Top 10 #GhettoHalloweenTreats from the Twitter-verse:

  1. Candy canes (leftover from LAST Christmas or early for THIS Christmas)
  2. Napkins @Its_NaeNae_Baby
  3. Peppermints w/the name of a local restaurant on ’em @ConvowithB
  4. Single crayons from the crayons pack
  5. Ketchup packets @ LWRIGHT01
  6. Chips in plastic bags @GorgeousBritnee
  7. McDonald’s Monopoly Tickets. (free small fries) @OnlineTHUG
  8. Shampoo bottle from a hotel @rappinjack
  9. Kool aid packets @Juan_Coolin
  10. Condoms @tonic_rod20

Candy photo sources

Starburst

kit kat

reeses pieces

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